My Morning at Sexy Coffee - Jackie C

9th April 2025

Okay so... I finally went to that new Sexy Coffee on Union Street and honestly?? I’m obsessed.

Like I walked in thinking it would be just another try-hard coffee shop with a cheeky name and overpriced cappuccinos but it’s actually soooo much more. First of all – the INTERIOR. I’m not even joking, it’s like walking into a Pinterest board but better. Velvet seats, moody lighting, little gold accents everywhere and plants hanging like you’re in some secret stylish jungle café?? It’s giving rich aunt vibes in the best possible way.

I went alone (solo self-care Saturday, hello) and the staff were literally so sweet. Like no awkward vibes, no one making me feel weird for asking 800 questions about milk options (oat gang 4ever), and the barista complimented my rings which... immediate bestie energy tbh.

Ordered a matcha latte (obvs) and an almond croissant because I was starving and also I saw someone on TikTok say the pastries were elite. Let me tell you – THEY DID NOT LIE.

The matcha? Like, easily top 3 I’ve had in Glasgow and I’ve tried A LOT. Not watery, not weirdly bitter, no clumps (why do some places serve lumpy matcha like it’s normal??) – just smooth, kinda creamy, and really pretty?? Like bright green and served in this cute little gold-rimmed cup that made me feel like I had my life together even tho I was running on 4 hours sleep.

And the croissant. Omg. It was warm (actual heaven), super flakey on the outside but with this gooey almond-y middle that was sweet but not too sweet?? Idk how to describe it properly but just know that I sat there eating it like it was a religious experience. If you love almond pastries... you need it in your life.

Also – the music?? Immaculate. Not too loud but like, cool enough that I literally opened Spotify mid-bite to add 2 songs to my playlist. Bonus points for that honestly.

I grabbed a seat by the window (big fan of people-watching while pretending I’m in a coming-of-age film lol) and just vibed out for like an hour. No one rushed me, it didn’t feel cramped or loud or stressful – just chill, cozy, aesthetic. Literally the kinda place you could bring your laptop to and suddenly be in your "productive uni girlie" era or go for a catch-up coffee that turns into a 3-hour deep chat.

Also wanna give a quick shoutout to the bathroom because YES that’s important. It was clean (thank god), had nice soap (??? major win), and kept the same cute vibes as the main café. Not sure why that mattered to me so much but it did.

Price-wise, I think I paid like £7-something for both? Which yes, I know, isn’t like cheap-cheap but honestly? Worth it. Like for the quality + the vibes + the general serotonin boost of being somewhere that doesn’t feel like a sad grey box? I’d pay again and again.

Overall I’m just really happy I went. The name’s a bit cheeky and fun (lol imagine telling your mum “I’m going to Sexy Coffee” like ok) but the place has actual substance. It’s cool but doesn’t have that snobby coffee-shop energy you sometimes get, and the staff made me feel v welcome which is major when you’re out on your own.

Anyway, long story short – 10/10 would recommend. Go for the vibes, stay for the matcha, leave with crumbs on your top and a smile on your face 💅

I’ll defo be back next week (probably dragging a pal this time) because I NEED to try one of those iced pistachio things I saw on their Insta. Also someone next to me ordered this huge cookie that looked illegal in the best way?? Sexy Coffee, I see u.

Last Updated - 9th April 2025